Do you want to be seen as pathetic by your Domme? Being the grovelling sub who leaves his dignity at the door? If you do, don’t expect to ever have sex with your Dominant Woman. Women don’t have sex with men they see as pathetic.
I know many Dommes who own pathetic slaves. They love having them because it is easier to be cruel to a pathetic man. (It is because they feel powerful by being mean, but aren’t real sadists. A real sadist like me will want to hurt subs, no matter attraction, but especially if she is attracted – hahaha.) But, such other Dommes don’t see pathetic subs as someone to get intimate or have sex with because, as said above, women don’t like getting sexual with men they see as pathetic.
If you truly want to be a pathetic sub because it is the way you need your submission to be, get a Domme who isn’t attracted to you, who thinks you average to ugly and even doesn’t like you.
Do you want to be desired by your Domme? Being the sexy sub who keeps his dignity to be attractive? That encourages her to want to be intimate and have sex with you? If you do, expect your Domme to find it hard to be mean and harsh to you.
Throughout the years, I have talked to many subs about how their past Domme couldn’t treat them pathetically or harshly because she was attracted to him, and preferred to turn him into their lover or boyfriend. (It sucks to be a pretty boy…hahaha!) It is as if she was Domme until she met him and then turned submissive herself or even vanilla. The sub feels hijacked and wonders whether his Domme was ever really dominant at all. (Again, it is because a Domme feels powerful by being mean, but isn’t a real sadist. A real sadist like me will want to hurt subs, no matter attraction, but especially if she is attracted…)
This is tricky because Dommes do want to have attractive subs, but if they become attracted to their sub, they often ‘let go’ of their power. (It is the difference between a woman playing the role of Domme, and a woman who is actually a Dominant Woman.) But, you do get Dommes like me who desire their sub without ‘falling’ for them or wanting more. It is because I enjoy pure D/s relationships. I’m not looking for a partner in my subs. Yes, I want a life relationship, and I have fallen in love with subs before, but I never pursue. I respect my agreements with my subs and never cross the line.
Yes, D/s isn’t so binary, but I’m talking in binary terms here to simplify the discussion.