At the beginning, even before a Femdom relationship has started, a sub can be overly enthusiastic with his devotion and expression of submission. You might think you need to impress your potential Mistress with your pure intensions and ability to surrender. Instead, however, your energy could be the very thing that is pushing your Mistress away. You may think you are flattering Her by your attention, your eagerness, your proaction, but in fact, you are offending Her ego.

A slave’s duty is to support their Mistress’s ego, to help Her feel secure and confident by not only obeying Her, but submitting according to Her – Her time, Her pace, Her level and Her intensity. When a slave moves too fast or dives too deep without being prompted by his Mistress, he is not submitting to Her, but his own ego. He is more concerned about his own performance, his own journey, and his own gratification (being satisfied that he made his Mistress happy). For himself, he is out-dominating his Mistress.

It is a common misconception slaves have that flaunting their submission will attract and please their Mistress. However, the slave’s submission should not be flaunted, except by his Mistress. A slave should never have pride, but be the pride of his Mistress.

There are two rules a slave must follow to let their Mistress shine:

First, you might inadvertently pressure your Mistress simply by your desire and willingness to submit. You must learn temperance; control your appetite for submission and moderate your passions. Most often, soft and discreet submission is much more powerful and intelligent, more pleasing to a Mistress, than direct and obvious submission. Rule: Temperance.

Second, never believe that submission is done through your own power. Your Mistress is the driving force and she is the one who should control your submission with Her foot on the accelerator or brake. Your submission – depth and breadth – is dependant on your Mistress, so do not think you submit on your own. Submit not only your body and heart, but your intellect, knowledge, experience and talents to Her to use for Her own Power and Glory. Rule: Your Femdom is the power behind your submission.