Are you practicing your pussy licking? And no, you don’t need a pussy to do it.
Too often men are very bad at cunnilingus because they haven’t had enough practice. For some silly reason men think that if they really like something, they will be good at it. No.
According to a BadGirlBible survey, for a lot of women, in fact 79.4%, have had at least one bad experience, and 55.9% said they were unsatisfied with it because of their partner’s bad technique. Yet, 90% say they still enjoy it no matter the bad experiences and technique… I guess they have high hopes.
Men, you are failing us!
A large part of the problem is that men do not practice developing skills and technique before the opportunity presents itself.
Thinking someone is hot will not make you automatically gain skills. Having feelings for someone will not automatically make your technique better. Enthusiasm will only carry you so far. And the fact is, if you are not good enough, you will likely not get another opportunity.
Men are perceived as having far more sexual experience than women because of their freedom to sleep around without social consequences. So, women naturally have high expectations. They expect you to know your way around a woman’s body from all the sex you have been getting from one-night-stands and your college years. (Ha! I know, right?)
What’s more, women don’t want to have to teach you. There is all this rhetoric about being open and telling your partner what you want, but most women aren’t sexually experienced enough to know what they fucking like. That’s why you get a ‘do what you want’ response.
Seriously, out of all my years of experience with different men, there have only been two – yes, two – that have been good enough for me. Their difference? Their confidence, their undeniable desire, their energy for it, their no-fear. They were all-in, mouth, digits, positions, servicing the whole area, and they had amazing technique – they knew what they were doing.
Yes, you should focus on doing what the woman likes, but that means having the skills and technique first, and then fine tuning them to her by sensing her cues and listening to her. But… for this to happen, you’re skills and technique already need to exist. No woman likes to be a practice dummy.
So without further ado, here are some exercises you can do to help you develop and practice pussy eating skills and techniques.
1. Bowl of Porridge
Make a bowl of sticky, sloppy porridge. Mix in 10 almonds.
Mouth
Retrieve each almond one at a time in the porridge using your tongue and lips only. This practices your ability to feel with your tongue instead of having to look. It also helps you get used to getting your face messy. And, at a certain time of the month, a women’s juice is thicker. Porridge gets you used to the different consistency.
Fingers
With the tip of one finger find each almond and slide it out of the plate along to the bottom with as little finger pressure as you can. This practices your fingers to be light and gentle, making long finger strokes through her pussy, and you get used to your fingers being creamy. Change each finger.
2. Passionfruit
Cut a passion fruit in half.
Mouth
With the tip of your tongue, lick up one seed at a time. This practices your tongue for precision and care. It also gets you used to tang, a common flavour in women.
Fingers
With your pointer finger, un-connect the passionfruit fibres from the inside of the shell without using your nail. This will practice your ‘come hither’ finger movement, which is good for stroking through her lips and also inside on her g-spot. Also, smell the passionfruit on your fingers, and lick off the juice. This practices your ‘show’ in front of her – you allowing her to see your enjoyment of her smell and taste.
3. Citrus
Cut off a grapefruit’s top to reveal a good diameter of the pink flesh. Squeeze a little to make it juicy.
Mouth
Use your tongue to lick and suck up the juices. When you lick, your own saliva will be activated on the grapefruit. Often, before you make her juices flow, you need to use the wetness of your mouth to create lube for the both of you. But also, in turn, licking her will make her juices flow. Licking grapefruit juice will prepare you for licking a sloppy pussy, especially after it has been fucked. It will prepare you for sourness, as sometimes this is the flavour of pussy at a certain time of month. Don’t be afraid to use your nose through the grapefruit. Practice so you can make the most of the sent of the fruit. This helps you get used to smelling a pussy and using the tip of your nose to push through her lips without inhaling fluid.
Fingers
Put your pointer finger in the centre core of the grapefruit and make little circles to open it up. This practices your entrance circling – putting the tip of your finger just inside her pussy entrance and circling to widen her. This can give her great pleasure. This circling technique can also be used for her ass. Use the cut top for little spanking taps with a flat palm using the fingers, creating a nice crisp sounds. This will practice spanking taps for her clit, and especially mound to increase arousal. You can flick the top of the flesh of the grapefruit with your fingers to get a light wetting. This will practice lightness for flicking a a click (or ass). Lastly, use all your fingers to open the middle of the grapefruit for your tongue to deeply enter to lick up the juice at the bottom. This practices you to open up a pussy-hole wide so you can lick deep inside, and make her feel stretched.
4. Long Cream Buns (Chocolate Eclairs)
You can buy these at specialty bakeries.
Mouth
Use your tongue to lick along the creamy slit lightly – big strokes with the centre of your tongue that require your head to move and little strokes just by your tongue tip – practice swapping between a fat, soft wide tongue and a harder, pointed tongue tip. Lick down to the bottom of the cream bun (éclair). This will act like the pussy crack. Allow the cream to enter your mouth but this is not the focus. You want to practice licking along the base of the long bun as if it is the base of her crack. This practices your tongue to lick deep through her flaps while getting your face get messy, but it also allows her taste to touch deeper in your mouth.
Fingers
Using two fingers, open them and run them along the sides of the long bun, allowing the cream to go in between your fingers. This practices you running your fingers through the crevice between her outer and inner lips.
5. Spaghetti
Cook some spaghetti to al dente. Cool.
Mouth
Slurp up spaghetti one at a time. Use your tongue to twist around the spaghetti to eat. This practices your mouth to do open sucking kisses all over her pussy.
Fingers
Use your finger in a circle motion to roll the spaghetti on. This practices circling around her clit, between her lips.
6. Custard
It’s better if it’s runny.
Mouth
Lap up the custard with your tongue – long strokes and quick strokes – just like a cat. This practices your tongue to be used for surface licks and to develop your muscles to quickly lick over her clit.
Fingers
Use your fingers to tap the surface of the custard to create little peaks. This practices your finger tapping on her clit, hole and ass to be quick gentle and precise.
7. Grapes
Seedless are best.
Mouth
Holding a single grape between your fingers, use your teeth to gently skin it in small strips, core to tip. This practices little, delicate bites and pulls of the soft and thin skin of her pussy. You can also practice fast nibbling on the flesh of the grape, making sure you don’t close to a bite (pinching) to do the same on the flesh of a pussy. It will practice your jaw to bite delicately, lightly and quickly.
Fingers
Gently squish a grape between your thumb and pointer, allowing the fibres to pass over each others, then rub the flesh over itself. This practices gentle pinches of the inner and outer pussy lips, squeezes and twists.
8. Fleshlight
Practice your tongue and finger work on a Fleshlight. Use your fingers in creative ways, experimenting with position, pressure, movement and pace. Memorise how the pussy feels on your fingers so you can replicate this with a real one when you have the opportunity. And, practice licking clit while you have your fingers moving in the hole – multitasking. You can also practice fingering the clit with one hand and fingering inside with the other to get used to doing two rhythm and techniques at once. Then swap your hands – being ambidextrous is a huge skill. Turn the Fleshlight at different directions so you will be able to pleasure no matter the angle.
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Now, of course, when you are licking the pussy of a Domme, she is likely going to test you at first to see what you’re made of. Then she will use the things she likes, guide or re-train the stuff that has potential, and discard the things she doesn’t care for. But training to be prepared for this will make Her process a lot easier and more enjoyable. The understanding: it is a lot easier for Her to shave off from a block of clay than it is sticking bits and pieces together to sculpt a masterpiece.
And I would suggest, for your own practice if you don’t have a Domme yet, and especially if you don’t already get hard and cum from cunnilingus, to then train your mind and body to do so. Start by jerking off as you eat out a grapefruit to program your body to be aroused, then orgasm, from the physical act and thought of eating pussy. If you can do this, it will give your future Domme so many opportunities to use your talent. It may inspire Her to put you in a cock cage, or to punish you if you cum before Her, or use cunnilingus as a Tease and Denial. Also, play around with putting a vibrator in your ass as you practice your cunnilingus skills. Often, people lose technique and energy when they are being pleasured themselves. You can train yourself not to do this. So, practice not letting your pleasure trump your Domme’s. It is when a submissive’s mind and body is highly reactive, that a Domme can do amazing things.
One thing to consider: the thing that accompanies skill and technique is the feeling (not sexual but emotional/dynamic) that you give her. Most women, vanilla or Domme, like to feel emotions during sexual encounters. But a Domme is more complex than vanilla – there is a big difference between making Her feel sexually desired and erotically desired. Just doing the physical, primal job won’t cut it. You need to activate your erotic desire to create an atmosphere between you and your Domme. You are both not only co-creators of your dynamic but also erotic desire and passion. This means that you need to be emotionally open (not needy) and active to please her.
Too often submissives make cunnilingus about them, about their submission, about their service about their worship, about their need for approval and their desire to do a good job – about their ego. This is when your emotional confidence, not ego, is important so your energy supports your Domme in Her pleasure rather than distracting Her with your submission. Sometimes submission is about doing a fantastic job but not being acknowledged for it. Don’t create a meta moment to draw attention to yourself. Don’t project yourself into Her experience. Just be the ball. The ability to do this is the difference between a good submissive and a great one.